Winter TV Review: The Best (and Worst) TV of 2010

I know I'm late to the party, but I have planned to get back to more television writing here at NYaT. I have to admit, I'm far from a TV expert. I don't have time to watch every show (and there are a few on my list to pick up in 2011) but I wanted to compile a list of shows I like a lot--and a few I couldn't stand. So without further ado, let's get to my list top television series of 2010:

Miss Blankenship was one of the best characters of 2010 (AMC)

Top 5 Series

1. Mad Men: It was a really weird year for Don Draper and SCDP but what made it different, made it great. In my opinion it was their finest season yet. The season started with the question "Who is Don Draper?" and by the end of the season we realized that it may be a man (and a company) headed for some rocky times. The omission of the very annoying Betty Draper for much of the season was enough to bump up the season and "The Suitcase" was one of the all-time great episodes of the show. The latter episode should get someone an Emmy (Elizabeth Moss who I have been critical of in the past was excellent) and I don't know what award we can give to "The Queen of Perversions", Miss Ida Blankenship, but maybe they can add her to the "in memorium" part of the Emmy's. Her death joins the "lawnmower scene" as the two most sickly funny things that have happened on the show.

2. Breaking Bad: Every once in a while I'll decide I've had enough of not watching a show that everyone else loves and catch up on it. Breaking Bad was an easy choice and I zoomed through two seasons of the show. I found it entertaining and was excited for the third season. And the third season blew me away like Jesse Pinkman blew that guy away in the finale. The shootout scene in the parking lot at the end of "One Minute" was something the Coen Brothers and Quentin Tarantino would have been proud of. The season finale left a lot of questions in the air for Walter White, Jesse Pinkman and the whole drug operation, but the season answered a lot of questions about the contender status of this show: it's truly one of the best. The mark of a good show for me is that when I can recommend it to my dad and we both really like it. Dexter and Breaking Bad are two of the best and they both fall under this category.

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24 Recap: The Heart of the Tragic Hero Wins Out in His Own Redemption

Jack Bauer is a man who is defined by many character traits, but heart and compassion aren’t always the first two that come to mind. But those were two traits that categorized the end of Jack’s reign on the television version of 24 which ended last night. I’m sure the reviews of last night will be mixed. Some people I know loved it and thought it was a great ending for a great television show that revolutionized how we watch TV. Others (our body count man from the bottom of the posts, Ari, for one) hated it and think that it was an injustice for the last two hours of a great action drama like 24 to have so little actual action and drama. Myself? I come somewhere in the middle. I think the writer’s took an easy way out but because they are making a movie and because of the American-superhero-like persona that Jack represents, it was the right move for the ending. But as the show’s final minutes ticked down, I don’t know whether I was sadder for Jack or sadder for the show which I’d been watching since a freshman in college was coming to an end. The truth is that unlike LOST (which the writers swear up and down is over in any and all forms including spin-offs), 24 is still an unfinished book and until we see the movie(s?), we haven’t really seen how 24 and the Jack Bauer story wraps up. But let’s recap the end of the television version one last time, shall we?

Redemption

Redemption is not just the name of the made-for-TV-movie that Jack and company did as a prequel for Season 7—it’s also a theme that kept on coming up last night. First redemption for those who kept 24 alive amidst cries to cancel the show before Season 8 even started. It wasn’t on the level of Seasons 1-5, but Season 8 was the best season since and was redemptive for the 24 writers who got royally killed (in this blog and elsewhere) for Season 6 and the ridiculous end to Season 7. But it was also a form of redemption for Jack Bauer the character who wanted nothing more than to finally get the justice he deserved for the people who were behind Freckle’s death. Sort of...maybe...ugh, not really.

I assume that’s where most of the audience’s frustration lies. Jack—personally—got no redemption. He didn’t kill Yuri Suvarov, the Russian mastermind behind the attack. He didn’t kill President Taylor who was behind the cover-up. He didn’t even kill Logan’s Executive Assistant who was spared by pulling the “D card” on Jack: he had a daughter. But most of all, fans like me are somewhat frustrated that he didn’t pull the trigger on Charles Logan. The man responsible for the deaths of President David Palmer, Michelle Dressler, Freckles, President Hassan, and many others was a man that Jack had in his grasp so many times—but was never fully able to pull the trigger. When Jack finally relented on pulling the trigger on Suvarov, he had a chance to just take out Logan and call it a day.

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Open Thread: The End of An Era Part 2 -- Goodbye 24!

One show down, one to go. Before LOST, there was another save-the-world-type thriller and that was 24. Before Jack Shephard was a flawed male lead prone to heroic actions and sacrifice, there was Jack Bauer who was much less outwardly flawed. He was the ever-do-good hero. Then Season 8 came and Jack Bauer has been unleashed. It seems no one can stop him and that may include President Taylor and even Chloe O'Brien. So how do you end this show? How does this final episode lead into the movie they are planning to make? And is there any way that Jack Bauer dies tonight (I say no)?

While LOST was beginning during the Iraq War, 24 debut coincided with 9/11. 24 has been eerily close to prescient on certain world actions (go back and watch Season 2 and realize the whole season scarily mirrors the build-up to the war in Iraq) and, at times, has seemed more like a reality show than most reality shows. It's a show that's shocked us and surprised us at times, made us laugh at others, and made us cheer on occasion. It also has left us debating heavy topics like whether it is worth sacrificing one person to save a lot more, whether it's all right to commit a crime to save a loved one, or whether torture is okay in any form or in any situation. We also debated quite a bit which Seasons of 24 were the best (my favorite is Season 1 followed by probably either 3 or 5).

It's also made us change our view on television a bit. The style and the pace of the show, the cliff-hangers, and the action have all been somewhat revolutionary. FOX is known for taking on these types of shows in the past (The Simpsons, X-Files, and Married with Children to name a few) and this was certainly one of those times.

But for those of us who love 24, the past few years have been tough. The show had a great first five seasons and then lost it's luster through a writer's strike and two sub-par outings. The plotlines were either ridiculous or predictable (oh no, another mole!) and the characters that were brought in to replace the Sherry and David Palmers and the Nina Myers of the world weren't able to live up to the task. Season 8 has changed the game a bit and provided a season that while ranking behind the first five, I believe has been worthy of 24. Tonight is the final two episodes and I'm hoping that 24 ends on a good note. I don't expect it to be a happy-go-lucky ending, but I hope it ends well and closes out a great second-half of the season.

This is an open thread so the comments are now open until the show starts. Let us know your thoughts, ideas, feelings, and theories on what's going to happen tonight. Recap will be up tomorrow. Hope you all enjoy it!

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24 Recap: There is nothing more dangerous than a wounded animal

Since Andrew is away this week on business I volunteered to handle the 24 recap. This is my first-ever TV recap for the revamped and improved NYaT.net - I will do my best to fill his considerable shoes.

When we last left Jack Bauer he had discovered, in a very Elin Woods-type moment, that President Logan was the voice behind the cover-up and beloved Renee's death. Logan now enters Jack's crosshairs, a grim place to be these hours.

Back at the UN President Taylor has her Press Secretary announcing Ethan Kanin's resignation for health purposes (completely believable, since he kind of had a sizable heart attack only a few hours prior) and revealing former President Charles Logan as the man behind on the curtain on the Russian's return to the peace talks. Logan looks entirely thrilled with himself as he watches and listens to the Press Conference on TV*. Unfortunately his happiness would have to be short-lived as trusted private sector advisor Jason Pillar rings him up with some bad news - the Russian team is dead (very dead in the case of Renee's shooter) and Jack has slipped out of their security cordon. Pillar once again recommends Logan distance himself from the Peace Accord - but it is too late, his ego got the best of him, and now his best chance is to try and lay it all at poor Allison's feet.

*Side Note: Was anyone as as surprised as I was when Logan was willing to put the Presser on MUTE mid-praise to have another conversation? With his ego I was expecting him to turn the volume up, not down.

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24 Recap: Every Time You Jack It, Another Russian Operative Dies

It’s all come down to this. After a season of Russian mafia, CTU moles, peace agreements, Islamic extremists, a foreign dignitary’s assassination, and a massive cover-up plot, we finally have our end-game: Jack Bauer vs. Charles Logan and the Russian government. In some ways, this all makes sense; the last time we had a great 24 season, we had Charles Logan and the Russians. Three seasons—and a “Redemption” trip to Africa—later, we’re back. We’ve even brought our old friend torture back after trying to be PC for a season and questioning the legality/morality of it. And oh boy have we all missed it. So what happened in this last action-packed hour? Let’s recap, shall we?

Two Things That Don’t Mix? Jack and Cole-a

We open up on Denny’s cold, dead body. Boy they found her quickly. How did Jack get out in that 10 second interval? Invisibility? Go-Go-Gadget Copter? Killed a few guys on his way out? Anywho…FP jr is brought up to ID Denny. The head officer on the scene asks FP jr who she is. Whoa…loaded question, dude. She’s Dana. She’s Jenny. She’s an IRK operative. She’s a Russian Operative. And she teamed up with you to make the worst-acted couple in the history of 24. We’ll go with Dana this time, though, it seems. The officer escorting FP jr says it was like an execution. It actually was exactly that. FP jr does not look happy—he wanted to kill her himself.

Jack is taking a taxi (Times Square Taxi?) and watching the video on the SD drive of Denny and Freckles’ shooter, the fEMT. They are arguing because she wasn’t supposed to contact him and she definitely shouldn’t be asking to speak to other people involved. She said she wants to be with FP jr. Don’t know if it’s genuine. Jack seems to care about as much as I care when the next Dane Cook movie is being released. Jack sends the video to his weapons buddy for an ID on the guy. “The girl?” his weapons buddy asks. “She’s dead,” Jack says.

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24 Recap: Jack’s Revenge and Denny’s Grand Slam

24 is best when Jack is teetering on the brink and revenge is a driving emotion. For a person as unpredictable as Jack, it seems odd to say, but you can really predict that he’s going to do the right thing in the end. But when he has something driving him towards revenge…well, watch out bad guys. In Season 1 he had his family’s safety, Season 2 he had the goal of avenging his wife’s death, Season 3 was the return and death of Nina, Season 4 was the kidnapping of his girlfriend (Audrey, though this wasn’t really enough of a drive to keep him going all season), and Season 5 was avenging President Palmer’s death. The general theme that had been absent for a few seasons was back in full force once that sniper bullet went right through Freckles. Last night, we got a glimpse of the ultimate revenge plot: Jack Bauer has 4 hours to kill as many people responsible for Freckles death as possible. Strap in your seats, folks, because 24: Season 8 is not going to be making a clean landing.

Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone

John Wayne rode off into the sunset at the end of his movies, but Jack Bauer is not John Wayne. A tip of the hat to the 24 writers for realizing that (and needing a “jumping off point” to their movie) and making sure Jack’s last day on TV was like his 7 days before: controversial and full of twists and turns. Something snapped in Jack the second that Freckles was taken away from him as so many women had been taken away from him before. And because he’s never going to be the same, it makes the viewing audience that much more invested in Jack’s revenge. It’s Guy Pierce in Momento, Denzel Washington in Man on Fire, Uma Thurman from Kill Bill, Robert DeNiro in Taxi Driver, and Sayid in LOST all rolled into one. Someone HAS to pay.

So how did we get to the shocking ending and--finally!--Denny’s death? Let’s review

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24 Recap: Jack'ing your Helicopter and The End of Loyalty

One of the things that 24 has shown over the years is that loyalty only goes so far…and then the urge to take a knife to the ones who you owe the most to and stab them in the back comes into play. This is especially true in here in our 8th and final season of 24. The people who owe the most to Jack (the President and Chloe) have turned against him. Ethan, who served his President so loyally—and even made a miraculous recovery from a heart attack—was a victim this week of a power struggle. Even someone like Denny, is owed more than to just be handed over to a “private security firm” for “interrogation”—well, maybe that’s stretching it a bit too far. But you see what I mean—this is a show is constantly telling us that no matter what you do for people, loyalty is only as strong as the next conflict’s issues, and most of the time, you’re bound to get screwed in the end.

Oh, So You Want Your Helicopter Back, Do You?

We sometimes forget how many amazing skills Jack has in his bag of tricks. He can speak Russian and German, can copilot a plane landing onto a highway, and last night we remembered he can also fly a helicopter. We saw him do it way back in Season 3 when he was freeing Ramon Salazar from custody (which is the season, oddly enough, when he had his only other real “sidekick” besides Freckles—Chase). And although we’ve seen him do it other times in between, last night was the first time we’ve seen him try to outmaneuver anyone and escape on that chopper since the Season 3 escape to Mexico. This time, Jack is amazingly able to duck under a pair of highly trained Air Force helicopters and land the helicopter on a building. Glad he’s not rusty after all those years. Maybe in his free time he’s been giving helicopter sightseeing tours around Manhattan.

Jack makes his way to ground level and tries to blend in. How can Jack blend in, though? Somehow he does since no one knows Jack. It’s not like he’s done anything for this country yet nobody recognizes him. Miley Cyrus’ cousin walked down the street and I guarantee you someone would know who they are; Jack does and he’s just another Joe Sixpack. Well one person who does know what Jack looks like is FP jr and Chloe* sends him into the field to get Jack. She also makes sure Arlo The Horndog and everyone else is tracking Jack. Arlo looks upset that he doesn’t get to use the satellite to spy on naked girls. So pissed.

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24 recap: Peace, At What Cost?

It dawned on me while watching last night’s episode: what’s the big deal with this peace agreement? I mean the whole season has revolved around getting this peace agreement done because everyone wants to bring peace to a region that hasn’t had it for centuries. But are we still that naive to think that just because we have a few countries signing a peace accord that all will suddenly be well? Middle Eastern countries have been signing so-called peace agreements for a long time with not much change. A country like Israel has a peace agreement with quite a few of their neighbors and that hasn’t gone as well as planned. A peace agreement is only as good as the word of the next leader in power and in a region of the world that seems to be controlled by military takeovers, coups, and rigged democratic elections peace is about as everlasting as a piece of Bazooka bubble gum. I say all this not to trivialize the fact that everyone on 24 seems hellbent on peace in this episode—but more as a premise to say that a lot of people are being stabbed in the back and kicked in the nuts. And I ask, for what, truly are we still doing this? Especially since one of the biggest partners on the deal has now been revealed as a lying group of terrorist supporters (more on this ridiculous plot later). Even John Lennon wouldn’t want to give this peace a chance.

Welcome Back to the Cold War, Comrade Bauer

No matter how far we’ve come in the past few decades, we still revert back to one thing: blame the Russians. Racial sensitivities stop us from using any domestic minorities as scapegoats. Our strained foreign relations have made us sensitive about using any hostile foreigners. Even Fake Islamic Nation’s rebellious sect can’t possibly be planning this whole attack on their own—no, they definitely need the help of someone. So, we blame the Russians.

We should have known that Moscow was behind all of this mess when we open up on Jack with a bloody red shirt. Did you get that metaphor? No. Good. Let’s move on. Jack wants to be alone with Freckles dead body. I was pretty sure that with all the people he’s killed over his life, Jack had to be developing some type of necrophilia, but to poor Freckles? Oh, wait, nevermind, he just wants to be by her side. But the nurse comes in and tells Jack that he gets no more fun time--they need to move Frecks. The nurse then asks if Jack’s the husband? Why does she need to know this? Well the hospital wants to contact next of kin. Of course Jack doesn’t know anything about her family; this was a one-hour stand. “Are you going to be OK?” the nurse asks Jack. No, I don’t believe he will be.

Another nurse comes over and gives Jack some shoes and a shirt as he watches them wheel away her body and he cries. Those tears could kill a man. Phone rings. It’s Chloe. She knows that the Baron is the one to talk to. Jack wants to do it. She doesn’t want him to. He insists and gives his word. That’s what this episode is all about—as Lady GaGa sings: “I promise this, promise this.”

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24 Recap: Where Every Woman Jack Touches Dies

The curse got Freckles too. Teri is dead. Nina is dead. Claudia too. Audrey is dead inside. Jack’s relationships never have to end with a breakup because, well, they all just die. Jack feels like he’s cursed and maybe, at this point, we can start to believe him. Why would you get close to him at this point? Death wish? Trying to live on the edge? You know that he’s going to put his country before you anyways. So why do women still do it? Because the allure of Jack Bauer, the All-American male is too great for most women to pass up, and like his British counterpart, James Bond, Jack Bauer’s women always find out way too late that his kiss is toxic. Jack Bauer--lady killer. RIP Freckles. Let’s rehash.

Why Freckles Died

It was a slow episode until the end. You sort of felt like this would be another one of those “set-up” episodes for what was coming next. But then—bam!—the gun went off and the whole season took another huge turn once again. I shouldn’t have seen it coming, but I fell into the “watching 24 one day late curse” (damn vacation got in the way of 24 watching) and got the dreaded “silent clock” message*. So I knew death was coming. I just didn’t think this would be the one.

*Side Note: I don’t mean to pick on any of my friends in particular (*cough* Paul *cough* Sarah *cough*), but when one of your friends may not have watched the show, instead of giving away big details of the show, maybe the best thing is to ask. To assume that someone who has just been on vacation has somehow caught the latest episode of 24 or LOST or anything like that where the ending would be giving away a lot is unfair. Just ask “have you watched?” and I would say “no! don’t tell me anything!” And this past episode wouldn’t have been spoiled. Oh well. It's a good thing I'm not upset (just kidding, by the way).

The episodes opens up with Jack telling President Taylor he’s sorry. Taylor says that he didn’t do anything wrong. Jack still feels he let her down for letting Hassan die. Jack, I feel like that’s about to be the least of your problems. Jack gives major props to FP jr, despite the fact that his relationship with Denny almost got everyone in New York killed. Stupid rookie mistake. Samir was the one guy still sort of alive when the mess was settled and the plan was to take him back to CTU to be interrogated.

Well he was alive until a fake EMT came around and gave him the dreaded “bad music needle”. You knew that wasn’t a nice sedative. The fake EMT (fEMT?) is a Russian guy who seems to be in cahoots with the Russian delegate who is trying to stop the peace process (?). The fEMT is following Jack and Freckles who, of course, are taking a cab. Couldn’t get them a car? They serve their country and all the government can afford is a Times Square Taxi*. Couldn’t they have had one car drive them home? No? Lame.

*Side Note: I just came back from a long weekend in Vegas (the aforementioned vacation). We debated as to whether New York was faker in 24 or in the hotel/casino New York, New York. I think it’s pretty much a tie. Both are horrible representations of what New York really is. The only “New Yorker” on this entire season of 24 has been FP jr’s horrible accent which really seems like a lovely season of misrepresenting New York. Oh, and we’re full of terrorists and moles. I heart NY.

When they get back to Jack’s apartment, we have an historic moment on the show: first mention of the recovery! Woohoo! Freckles inquires about the name of Jack’s granddaughter, which, of course, is Teri (bad foreshadowing) and wants Jack to know that she won’t “hold him down” (good foreshadowing)…and then, the hot kiss we’ve all been waiting for! Jack picks her up and leads her…away. Time to get Jack’d.

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24 Recap: The Best Bitchslapping Episodes of the Season

Well that was much better, wasn’t it? This whole season we were building up towards something big and we finally seemed to hit the nail right on the head last night. My plan was the two hours of 24 and then the second half of the NCAA National Championship game. I got two amazing endings. The basketball final was one for the ages. The one on 24 was so game-changing-ly delicious that I think it might have seen our best “episode” in years. Why did I put episode in quotes? Because it was two episodes—AKA a two-hour event—that lived up to its billing.

Taking Yourself Hostage is So Hardcore

The ending was so shocking and so deliciously 24 that I think we need to backup two hours and figure out how we got there. The sun was rising. Jack was busy escorting President Hassan back to the United Nations when Hassan decided to take matters into his own hands—literally. Hassan crowbars Jack to the back of the head (seemed a little light, but Jack went down) and points a gun at Freckles. He then (for some reason) turns over his gun to the guy who had been trying to take him hostage in the first place (Bishop) and orders his wife, daughter, Frecks and Jack into a room where he adds a crowbar to the lock so they’re nice and trapped*. Hassan and Bishop exit to the street (7th Ave? Really? How did we get to the West Side? I need a 24 geography lesson) where there is an SUV waiting with keys underneath. How nice and convenient. Hassan has literally taken himself hostage. Now that’s a Jack Bauer move.

*Side Note: OK, here’s what I don’t get. Hassan is an honorable guy…but all those Secret Service people who fought for him when he was taking fire last episode now died for nothing. They sacrificed their own lives so he could get away and now he’s turning himself into the same people who were after him. Also, why the hell would he give Bishop his gun? What’s stopping Bishop from putting a cap in Jack and Freckles and pistolwhipping Hassan’s daughter and wife? He doesn’t want them getting free and blowing the mission. He had every reason to just kill Jack and Freckles since he was trying to do the same exact thing like 20 minutes before. Even Jack yells, “Mr. President, you can’t trust him!” Why did it change now? Why was this totally missed?

Jack calls Chloe for help (“Can you hear me now?” Sprint must be sooooo pissed that Jack’s hocking for Verizon now) and tells her that General Brucker is the one behind all this. Jack gets a phone call in to the President where he tells her that her Cabinet has been compromised and that she needs to confront him now. I mean she was already onto something wrong since she had just asked for updated casualty numbers, Hassan and Ethan (who Rob Weiss locked in his office to die). Chloe then watches as Jack carjacks some poor dude in a Hyundai who is trying to grab the morning paper. Sucks for you, dude—your car just got Jack’d.

Brucker, Rob Weiss and Bishop get to the terrorists just as the bomb is about to go off. Samir calls Tarin and tells him to stop the bomb. And with a few seconds left until detonation, it’s a good thing. Especially for Tarin who seems more than relieved. Tarin and Bishop then do a very cool phone trade: Hassan for the bomb. Meanwhile Taylor and Secret Service invade Ethan’s office, she has Brucker arrested and she smacks the shit out of Rob Weiss—and threatens him with treason. She’s really not happy about his treason and doesn’t want his promise of “plausible deniability”. Too late, Madam President—Weiss has confirmation*; Hassan is with the terrorists. Bitchslap number 2.

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24 Recap: The Beginning of the End

This is it. The end. I know I said I was happy about 24 ending, but the proximity to the finale left me feeling nostalgic. So I ditched the note-taking for a week, sat back and watched the episode last night like I had from the start: with wide-eyed wonder. How would they end a show that had revolutionized television? How would they take us towards a finale none of us really wanted to reach? How would said finale “tee us up for the movie” as Kiefer Sutherland promised? And how much longer do we have to deal with Denny? I need answers to my questions, DAMMIT, and I’m going to interrogate this episode like Jack—with the aid of nothing else but my own two hands. Here we go…

In the Line of Fire

Jack McCoy Shephard Bauer (maybe I do need notes) has wore a lot of different hats over the years. He’s been an agent, head of CTU, head of field Ops, a paper pusher for the Department of Defense, undercover, terrorist bait, a trading chip, on the run, in hiding, etc etc. The hat he was given last night was as a bodyguard. Of course, with a nuclear threat against the city of Manhattan, the best use of Jack Bauer’s time is to escort a dignitary. It’s not like he could be chasing down terrorists (oh wait, he could be? My bad). I’m sure you’re right, Madam President, we should definitely dedicate America’s most valuable natural resource to the same role that Kevin Costner played in Bodyguard or Clint Eastwood played in In The Line of Fire.

Oh right—this just in—where Jack goes, so does the firefight. He realized something was up and started to retreat but it was too late. Jack’s convoy was attacked (by Americans, no less…more on that ridiculousness later) and like everyone who partners Jack on a mission, they are being knocked down like bowling pins. A heroic Secret Service female agent tells Jack to stay with President Hassan while she adds to Ari’s body count. Good plan, lady. Why don’t you both go with Hassan? Wouldn’t that make more sense? Isn’t the point of the Secret Service to stay with whomever they’re protecting and make sure they’re safe? Is she promoting FOX’s new show, Human Target? Regardless, she’s a dead woman.

Jack, Freckles (so happy to have her back) and company are fleeing when Hassan tells Jack to go back for his men*. Jack knows better—those people only signed one episode contracts. They continue to run through this tunnel which all of a sudden has gotten a lot larger than when they were going the other way and realize they are trapped. Jack gives Hassan a gun and Freckles instructions to fire willy nilly into the crowd once Jack sets off a smoke bomb. What did that do? The last time I saw someone brandish a gun that recklessly, Plaxico was in The Latin Quarter. Oh wait…it doesn’t matter. Jack and Freckles unlocked the code for unlimited ammo! Gotta love 24, the video game.

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24's Clock Has Hit Zero, Dammit!

Jack has tortured interrogated his last suspect. Word came down tonight that 24 has officially been canceled. I was actually a big fan of this occurring, but it's still sad to know that Jack, Chloe, Freckles, and the rest of CTU are coming to an end. My feelings were that a movie would be the way to finish things up and I'm still not ruling that out of the works. I'm not sure where this season will rank in the show's history, but after the past few weeks, my hope is that the show will be going out with a bang. Regardless this season seems like the last we'll see Jack kicking ass on TV.

So how did the news come down? Well, I found out from Mary Lynn Rajskub (Chloe on the show) tweeting about it on her Twitter account. Read this account from top to bottom to get how it went down. The two with the recycle-looking signs are tweets from other users, the last one (meaning the first you see) being the funniest:

And Yahoo! TV got Kiefer Sutherland's view of things and includes news about the movie still in discussion and the finale date. (H/T Dad):

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24 Recap: So I’m About to Marry a Mass Murderer…at the Jersey Shore

If they made a list of worst television girlfriends I would think you would have to put Denny right up there. But do you know who else from this past year goes right up there? Sammy “Sweetheart” from Jersey Shore. And you know what the tell-tale sign of a bad girlfriend is? When she makes the boyfriend get into fights for her only to stab him in the back when the time comes. But if you take this comparison a little further, Ronnie and FP jr have a ton of same personality traits: bad accents, ridiculously delivered lines, undeserved loyalty to a lying girlfriend, and they beat the crap out of people when they fight. I’m sure I could take this analogy a bit further, so as I go through the recap of this game changing episode—with a plot so full of holes, you could drive a fleet full of zodiacs with nuclear rods on it, a human resources department so inept at CTU that Tobey Flenderson from The Office would refuse to work there—we’ll figure out who the rest of the members of 24 equate to which members of Jersey Shore.

Chloe O’Brien as Snooki

Misunderstood at first (or mistaken as slightly “off”--I mean Chloe does look a bit autistic) but knows how to get things done. Also, she’s not a big fan of violence or people telling her what to do. The most disappointing thing about the ending of this episode is that for 59 minutes, Snooki er, Chloe shined. It was her finest piece of work. It was like the episode where Snooki finally got back into the group and was partying with her pals only to get punched in the face by a school teacher. Damn you, harsh world! The dialog between Chloe and Bubba (who doubles as the boss, Brian, here in so many ways) was great this episode. We start the episode off with Bubba whining about losing all aerial surveillance and drone capabilities. Bubba, that’s been a problem since hour 1 this season, why should anything change now? Looking a little shaken up, Chloe asks Bubba if he’s all right and gets the great response: “No, Chloe, I am not okay.” Poor Bubba; first 'Nam, now this!

Things get worse for Bubba when NSA arrives. I could list the amount of times that NSA has screwed things up on this show (all of Season 2 with their moles), but you could tell from the start they weren’t going to be good news for the CTU crew. NSA is on site and pulling power plays. The guy who helped design it is there and he’s not happy what Bubba has done with the place. Does he mean the hole blown through the side of the building or the fact that they allow moles into their operation? Such a loaded statement there when you think about it (don’t think too hard).

Well Chloe is trying to fix things but she’s getting distracted by everyone. First Denny shows up and Chloe tells her to get the heck out of her way. Then she tries to go to Bubba or Arlo the Horndog (who is definitely Pauly D—a good enough guy who just wants to go get drunk and get laid) for help but both aren’t giving her the support she needs. Then she goes down to convince the NSA guys to listen to her but no one is having a bit of her. So, after a quick phone call with Freckles, who tells her to “do what she needs to do”, Chloe does just that. She walks back into the room where NSA is working, demands they follow her plan to drill into the trunk line, and when they don’t listen (and her anger builds), she pulls a gun. “You’re probably an OK guy when you’re not at work,” Chloe said to the NSA guy as she made him leave the room. Poor Chloe/Snooki and their guy troubles.

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24 Recap: You Down With EMP?

Now that was a lot better, wasn’t it? Sure there are plot holes bigger than New York City potholes and a sideplot dangerously close to Worst.Sideplot.Ever. status. But we finally have some action and some intrigue and something to look forward to as the season progresses. My hope coming into this episode is that 24 would find a way to salvage their last (my hope anyways, despite reports to the contrary) season with a furious finish. Well, while it’s certainly not great, we’re seeing glimmers that at least we’ll end this show on a bang. But before we get that far ahead of ourselves, we had a bang of our own this episode: welcome back EMP!

Getting the [Electromagnetic] Pulse

24 is not the first to use the EMP. Ocean’s 11 did it with Don Cheadle. And in 24’s 4th season, with Habib Marwan as a threat, and Jack and Paul Raines (Audrey’s ex) hot on their trail, a corporation (McLennen-Forster) set off an EMP to destroy all their own files*. So while I was surprised to see it again, I wasn’t shocked. And this time, the EMP was actually used by terrorists instead of some corporate execs trying to avoid a slap on the wrist.

*Side Note: Then the corporation took the impending blackout as a chance to send a private militia after Jack and Paul which resulted in Jack having his one nice moment with Islamic people in the first 6 seasons of the show (when he had to take over their ammunition shop to cover from the militia). It also resulted in Paul getting shot and Audrey ridiculously switching allegiances from Jack to Paul even though Paul had been stalking her life since the separation (and refusing to give in to a divorce) and Jack and her had fallen deeply in love—and Jack had just risked his life by going solo against a base full of terrorists and blown them all up to save Audrey and her father. Audrey, you are an ungrateful bitch.

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Mad Men barbie dolls -- collect the whole set!

Great news, Mad Men fans.  For the low, low price of only $74.95 you can purchase a full set of Mad Men barbie dolls!  This 4-doll collection includes a very curvy lifelike Joan Holloway, an accurate replication of real-life barbie doll Betty Draper, and of course two dapper iterations of Roger Sterling and the notoriously handsome Don Draper.  The Sterling Cooper office background is sold separately (j/k).

You can find out how to purchase the set here.  Allow me to fire a preemptive shot across the bow to anyone who wants to reproduce (no pun intended) the bathroom scene from the eternally-underrated comedy Grandma's Boy.  Resist the temptation, fellas.

One more link before I depart for the day.  Time published an article predicting that this season will be the last for Jack Bauer and 24.  Thanks for the novel prediction, Time -- you have once again shown why you are an antiquated source of news that nobody reads.

In any case, they are probably right -- the show's ratings have gone down in recent seasons, while the economy refuses to recover and production expenses have remained high.  Yet here is the Cliff's Notes version of the two uplifting takeaways from the article.  First, it's nice to see 24 get credit as one of the signature TV series from the 2000's.  It definitely belongs right up there with The Sopranos, Lost, and the Wire (albeit for different reasons than those shows).  Second, we now have further confirmation that talks are ongoing about a 24 movie.  As long as the movie doesn't put a black eye on the franchise (a la the most recent X-Files movie) I will be very excited to see Jack Bauer on the silver screen.

24 Recap: Tarin Up My Heart

If we had any emotional attachment to the characters in this season of 24, last night’s episode would have been gut-wrenching. Unfortunately, it’s hard to feel that bad for characters that we just met. ‘Tis the problem with the eighth iteration of a show that was considered “revolutionary” for killing off main characters with just a flick of the writer’s wrist. That being said, we had three scenes that were supposed to be emotional this episode (an episode that looked like it was filler for what comes next)—let’s take a look at those three scenarios:

In a chamber of Marcos' heart (or, at least, the hospital)

The planning of the terrorists on 24 is so meticulous. They not only bring the bomb and the detonator with them, but they also bring a cellphone and a magic marker in case they have to trap themselves in a hyperbaric chamber and get instructions to manually detonate the bomb and kill themselves to escape capture. And Marcos was no different. Apparently an amazing sketch artist, Marcos had drawn up a schematic of the wiring of the bomb in the few minutes between last episode and this episode on the walls of the chamber.

Nothing Jack could say would sway the young man from wanting to rig this device to blow himself up and when Jack found out it would take the entire episode to drill through the chamber*, he knew he needed to find another way in—the kid’s mom. It ends up that Marcos father was from the Fake Islamic Republic and he committed suicide after being imprisoned and losing his ability to find jobs. Marcos decided to become a spy for the country after his father died so he too could be imprisoned er, so he could become a terrorist for his country.

*Side Note: They tell Jack that it would take 40 minutes to drill through and instead of telling them to get started ASAP, they wait about 40 minutes to start drilling. So with 10 minutes left to go in the episode, they send out the drill team. Genius. Maybe if they would have started sooner…oh well, sorry Marcos.

But it ends up little Marcos was not only born in the United States and has a mother who is American, but he also is a huge momma’s boy. Kid never left the teat. It ends up Marcos, a terrorist ideologue with ideas about “making America pay”, has a soft spot in that hardened heart and Jack wants to try to exploit it.

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24 Recap: The Episode that Sounded Like a Hail Mary or Some Other Football Play

I haven’t been shy about my feelings about 24 so far this season—it had been C+ quality going into last night. The article I had read leading up to last night’s episode touted it as one of the best of the season so far. So excuse me for having been a bit skeptical, especially when the episode had an early section devoted to Denny and FP jr. trading accents and ideas about getting rid of bodies. But what resulted was the best episode of 24 so far this year and hopefully one that marks the turnaround of a show that has been languishing below 24 standards so far this season. Was some of it 24’s equivalent of a “Hail Mary”? Sure. But when you need to score as bad as 24 did with a big episode, sometimes you just need to call an audible, throw it deep for once, and see what happens. Are we going to be using a lot of football terms in this recap? In the words of Sarah Palin: you betcha!

What made this episode work was that it took classic 24 and put an interesting twist on it. It’s still not great (let’s put that out there, too), but 24 took a page from the old playbook and worked it to semi-perfection. But, you ask, what about what Bubba said that “it’s not exactly regular protocol to ferry a dead body across the city?” Well it isn’t…but this isn’t the first time that 24 pretended someone was dead to lure others into a trap. Remember in Season 1 when Jack got the cellphone bomb from Dennis Hopper but didn’t know it was a bomb until he went to go visit President [David] Palmer*? What did Jack and the President do after the bomb went off? They faked President Palmer’s death (mostly to save Kim Bauer who had been kidnapped by the Drazens), much to the protestations of Sherry Palmer. So if faking President Palmer’s death was the Wildcat, last night’s Farhad plot was like Wildcat 2.0.

*Side Note: Wayne Palmer’s presidency is again making my life more difficult. Damn you, Season 6! You’re the football equivalent to the 2000 Super Bowl for me as a big Giants fan. Sure it was great because your team was in the Super Bowl, but the results were painful to watch and look even worse in retrospect.

So how did we get a dead Farhad? Well he decided to get out of his great hiding spot and got two bullets to the chest from a fleeing terrorist. As Farhad was dying, Jack was imploring the medic that he needed to keep him alive. To which the medic replied “let me do my job.” If more people had the attitude of the medic, then I think more stuff would get done in 24-world. But alas, not even the medic can do his job to a man who is shot twice in the chest before CTU can upload a file of all the Fake Islamic Country’s operatives inside the United States. Darn.

Well Jack quickly comes up with an audible to save the mission: let’s pretend Farhad isn’t dead, leak to the press that he’s alive and going to X hospital, and lure the terrorists into a trap when they come to shut him up for good. When Jack tells Bubba his idea, Bubba responds that “it sounds like a Hail Mary” to which Jack responds “it’s the only play we got*.” Hut, hut, hike!

*Side Note: Um, isn't this stolen from Snakes on a Plane when Eddie Kim says "You think I didn't exhaust every other option?" about putting snakes on a plane. It's basically the same thing. Or just a great excuse to reference that amazing line from the movie.

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24 Recap: Where Ridiculous Accents and Back-Alley Deals Rule

There comes a point in every man’s life when he has to decide if the show he’s watching is really doing it for him anymore. I’m about at that point with 24. Like a faithful, old dog, I cannot yet bring myself to put it down, but it’s been sad to see it struggle. We’re not supposed to laugh that much when we watch 24, but I found myself doing that way too much this past episode. I don’t know if it’s bad acting, bad writing, or just unimaginative plot lines/dialog, but 24 has entered an area I never thought I’d see it: ridiculous. From the accents of the characters to the (literally) back-alley dealings to Really.Bad.Sideplot. which is now vying for Worst.Sideplot.Ever. status, this season is pushing fans loyalty to 24 just a bit too far. The good news, the plot has finally turned to the point that 24 has a chance to save things going forward--but 9 episodes in (37.5% done), my patience with the show is starting to wane.

If I was Jack Bauer, I would just walk around punching people. He’s lived a hard life, been wronged by too many people, and has a lot of frustration to take out. And I’m not just talking about punching bad guys, but I’m also talking about cops, office workers, construction workers, lawyers, men, women, children, dogs, old ladies, Guidos, Guidettes, Snooki, Dane Cook (please), athletes, tax collectors, politicians…basically anyone in his way. Why? Because there are no consequences anymore. He doesn’t even get a timeout or a slap on the wrists*. Beat the crap out of a guard (in an awesome move where he knocked the guy down, used his handprint to open the door, and then knocked him out again), threaten another guard (“Son, you better put that down, you’re going to get hurt”) and then grab a Justice Department lawyer by her neck and throw her up against the wall? You not only get to walk, but you’re put in charge of CTU Field Ops. Congrats!

*Side Note: This is nothing new. I know that. And really, Jack deserves his blanketed immunity and lifelong “Get Out Of Jail Free” card. But there is a limit to what one can do and get away with it. It’s one thing when you’re torturing people, but it’s quite another when you’re constantly beating up law enforcement. Here are my levels of fear if I worked for law enforcement in reverse order: 3. Criminal with a gun, 2. Terrorist, 1. Jack Bauer. There’s a problem when the guy who is supposed to protect the country is your biggest fear to beat the crap out of you.

Back to Jack, he said the worst possible thing he could ever say to Freckles: “you have me.” That means we’re about to see that neither of them have each other. Wonderful. Freckles, I would like to introduce you to the long list of women that Jack loved: they’re all dead/cooped up in a mental institution. And he said shit like “you have me” to them as well. And he probably meant it in some way. But in the end, they all ended up sad and alone. We’ve come to the point that Jack Bauer is worse to women than Tucker Max—at least the author of I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell satisfies some of his women and they all know what they’re getting into before they jump in. Jack teases girls with lines like “you have me”. I’m calling BS on you, Jack.

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24 Recap: Thinking About the Possibility of a Movie

This week’s episode of 24 was good—probably the best since the openers—but it’s still not great. If you’re not bringing out your big guns during Sweeps, especially going against the Olympics, when do you plan to bring them out? Maybe the problem is that 24 doesn’t have big guns anymore. It’s a sad thought. For me, it was like when David Cone suffered through the 2000 baseball season for the Yankees. You kept on waiting for him to get over the hump and show signs of his former, dominant self who helped the Yankees change their pitching persona. But it never happened…at least not during the regular season. But the Yankees gave Cone a chance in the World Series in a huge spot against the Mets best hitter, Mike Piazza. It was a role unfamiliar to the lifelong starter, Cone, who came in as a reliever, but Cone got Piazza to pop up. It got me to thinking: can this 24 movie idea—that Variety says has gained some serious traction (H/T Jay)—be the positive final hurrah we’re all looking forward to for Jack Bauer?

24’s biggest problem now is what made it popular when the show debuted: the real-time format. In real-time, Jack can’t show ill effects of having the crap beat out of him, he can’t be limping or injured, and he certainly can’t go to the hospital. That’s why it was funny this week when the EMT told Jack he “had” to go to the hospital. Jack said “that’s not happening”, but we all knew his answer before he even said it. Jack has gotten beaten and tortured and knocked around. He’s even been stabbed. But he seems to have no signs of it. No black eye, no bleeding cuts, no lingering problems.

In 24’s first three seasons, the show seemed to succeed for me because they kept his injuries somewhat real, which kept the show somewhat real. In Season 1, Jack fell asleep from exhaustion while hiding out at the construction site and almost blew his cover. In Season 2, Jack’s heart having stopped from being tortured affected him the rest of the season, especially in the last episode when his heart gave way momentarily. In Season 3, Jack seemed to be over heroin addiction in under 24 hours, but at least for a while he seemed to suffer from the real effects of withdraw. Even last season he seemed to be slowing down at the end from the effects from radiation poisoning.

Now? None of that. The format is such on 24 that events can’t stop for trivial things like hospital visits or doctor’s appointments. But 24 is trapped in that real-time format and stuck with the hour-to-hour, week-to-week grind of having to produce 24 episodes that people want to watch.

So how do they get out of that mold? Do a movie. On paper, this is a brilliant idea. The show as it has been constituted hasn’t worked for a whole season since Season 5. There have been flashes of brilliance along the way but the show gets too tied down in sideplots and details and episodes that go no place to be constantly good anymore. Part of it has been that they’ve run out of fresh ideas, but part of it is that they’re a victim of their own success. And while the parts of the show that are good—the flashes of brilliance—may not be enough to carry the show. But they could carry a movie.

Let’s break out the problems I foresee:

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24 Recap: Freckles Goes Dark and Not Just In Hair Color

In college I would start a new semester thinking that it would be forever until the next break and then by the time I stopped to think for a second, we were a quarter of the way done, a lot had happened, we were getting ready for midterms, but I felt like I hadn't done any work. Well, folks, we're a quarter of the way done with 24. 6 episodes in and not much has happened although a lot has happened. President Hassan? He's already gone from President (David) Palmer* to President Logan in 3 episodes. But although not much happened this episode, I feel like we're getting ready for the showdown we've been waiting for: Jack vs. Vladamir and Freckles vs. Jack(...in bed).

*Side Note: Season 6 was a waste, but even more so when you think that they wasted Wayne Palmer's presidency on that season. I was never a big Wayne fan, but if you were going to make another President Palmer, at least use it in a season like this one where you need to weigh good vs. bad and make decisions. All Wayne did was get blown up, shot up with adrenaline and teeter on the brink of death. That's it. I feel like 24 used and disposed of Wayne Palmer like the New York Giants did with Kurt Warner. And, as you can tell, I'm still upset by both.

You know it's a weird episode when Chloe is the most put-together of all the women on the show. Freckles is teetering on the brink of insanity (more on her later) and Denny (my nickname for Dana/Jenny) may have already gone over the edge. It's a good thing there's no national crisis or anything while she's dealing with her issues. Seriously, she works for a government organization that has routinely denied the rights of the people it has detained. Plant some evidence on this guy that makes it seem he was involved in Hassan's assassination attempt and then send the fucker back to jail. Or kill him. Or send him to a government facility to steal money and send the cops after him to kill him. You pick. Just do it and get this side plot out of the way.

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